yes, i am fragile. handle with care.
my heart suddenly seems like made of glass. a glass heart. fragile yet transparent. but you cannot see what's inside it. because i spread dark mist mix with black cloudy smokes to covers what i have, what i'm feeling. you can have it. you can keep it. just don't break it in the name of curiosity of what's inside it.
yes, i am fragile. handle with care.
-mm
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
book of shadow
another dream...i was in a dark tunnel-like, but it wasn't a tunnel...i heard my name being called...there were at least five different voices in one echo...i saw a rat, lurking, finding it's way out...i lend him my lighter (coz I always carry one on my right hand pocket)..he refuses..he says "I need a torch..these stupid lighter won't work!..and it has a snake printing on it!...am a rat god damn it!"...then he fleed..whatta smuck...i continued walking (in this dream I kinda enjoy being there, wasn't looking for a way out)..then a neon sign "exit" next to it "exist"..i rubbed my eyes...and said to maself "two exit? or they just cant spell?"...my fon buzzing..i put it on silent mode before i entered the tunnel..an sms..."got light?"...I replied "who's tis?"..coz the number wasnt on my list...then another sms came in "i love you too" ( i never said these words for a very long time now, so i know tat i was dreaming)...I ignored, then another sms.."It's the damn rat, u bitch!",
- wh (wat the hell was that?)
- wh (wat the hell was that?)
Monday, February 18, 2008
insomnia paranoia
2.28 a.m
typing...brain dead...dunno wat to write
i been taking a vacation to twilight zone for few weeks now
i think..i bought a one way ticket
yes, i hate tis place
too many photographs of wat it used to be
constant reminder
i'd reely like to move on
i need a good travel agent tat can e-mail to head back 'home'
this isnt my place anymore
could seriously use a bottle of vodka now
yes, i drink clear stuff...red wine's exception
too bad this is a PG-13 resort
- wh (isnt tat t lame-est thing u ever read in your entire life or wat??)
typing...brain dead...dunno wat to write
i been taking a vacation to twilight zone for few weeks now
i think..i bought a one way ticket
yes, i hate tis place
too many photographs of wat it used to be
constant reminder
i'd reely like to move on
i need a good travel agent tat can e-mail to head back 'home'
this isnt my place anymore
could seriously use a bottle of vodka now
yes, i drink clear stuff...red wine's exception
too bad this is a PG-13 resort
- wh (isnt tat t lame-est thing u ever read in your entire life or wat??)
...i 'like' you...
If I must measure up the amount of my 'like' for you, beb..
It will take the entire rain forest with all its living creatures. Reptiles included.
Miss you.
(heavily drugged, perscriptioned)
- wh
It will take the entire rain forest with all its living creatures. Reptiles included.
Miss you.
(heavily drugged, perscriptioned)
- wh
Friday, February 15, 2008
one perfect uncivil afternoon
he's just unrefined...or you just don't mean a thing to him?
it takes a lot for a girl to make a phone call to a guy, she only dates couple of times. when she finally brave enuf to dial, it's busy...she's dialing again...busy again...she thinks it's a sign!
but, what are those signs?..the line engaged means not to call him or try harder?
then when he finally picks up the fon, he talks to her for few minutes then said he got sum errand, and said "we talk later..."
then she waits (his last sentences were implying tat he would call later)...and of coz...he didnt call till the next mornin...not fon call either...some sorta text messages....
to me it's a sign...that says "MOVE ON, girl...find a new one will ya!"
- wh
it takes a lot for a girl to make a phone call to a guy, she only dates couple of times. when she finally brave enuf to dial, it's busy...she's dialing again...busy again...she thinks it's a sign!
but, what are those signs?..the line engaged means not to call him or try harder?
then when he finally picks up the fon, he talks to her for few minutes then said he got sum errand, and said "we talk later..."
then she waits (his last sentences were implying tat he would call later)...and of coz...he didnt call till the next mornin...not fon call either...some sorta text messages....
to me it's a sign...that says "MOVE ON, girl...find a new one will ya!"
- wh
Monday, February 11, 2008
is that the only chemistry between us?
"i thought i know you somewhere" or "you're just so familiar to me..." or "it's like a de javu meeting you..."
been heard such sentences?
i've experienced these quite sometimes. when i thought i met people coincidentally but feels like i've already known them for years. and then i start asking my self about WHY i have to meet and have them in my life. there must be something. because i believe there is no such things as coincident.
chemistry.
when you meet new people and suddenly feels comfortable around them. that's chemistry. i thought of that too often as i seems like NOT always felt it. it doesn't have to include love and affection. because you do need chemistry to make friends too.
strange.
what strange is sometimes because of the comfy we got, we failure to judge if the comfy is about falling in love, or just another chemistry.
revering to my writings... is that the only chemistry - between us?
-mm
been heard such sentences?
i've experienced these quite sometimes. when i thought i met people coincidentally but feels like i've already known them for years. and then i start asking my self about WHY i have to meet and have them in my life. there must be something. because i believe there is no such things as coincident.
chemistry.
when you meet new people and suddenly feels comfortable around them. that's chemistry. i thought of that too often as i seems like NOT always felt it. it doesn't have to include love and affection. because you do need chemistry to make friends too.
strange.
what strange is sometimes because of the comfy we got, we failure to judge if the comfy is about falling in love, or just another chemistry.
revering to my writings... is that the only chemistry - between us?
-mm
thank you for letting me smoking
i remembered how terrible it was, for me, to stay in a room loaded with smokes, it's like fumigation spree with people dancing while holding a bottle of tequila...pppfffttt
years later...i keep having the same new year's revolution...i mean it tis year (2003,2004,2005....)...
and guys who don't smoke (usually cuter) don't dig women who are...i respect that...hence, i ended up with smokers, for quite sumtimes (read: years)
but currently..."thank you for letting me smoking", even drag sum while am at it, can i keep you?
kidding lah....
- wh
years later...i keep having the same new year's revolution...i mean it tis year (2003,2004,2005....)...
and guys who don't smoke (usually cuter) don't dig women who are...i respect that...hence, i ended up with smokers, for quite sumtimes (read: years)
but currently..."thank you for letting me smoking", even drag sum while am at it, can i keep you?
kidding lah....
- wh
free sex = overated (sex for free)
u've seen those guy walkin around with t-shirt "will work for sex"...i second that...i dont mind a one night stand, at least i get a better fourplay and good service. but can it be as good as this?
http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1700821,00.html?cnn=yes
- wh
http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1700821,00.html?cnn=yes
- wh
Sunday, February 10, 2008
catch me a dream (the saga continue)
recurrent dream...just wat i need now, all these pills..green, periwinkle even...owh tat bubbly soft capsules are joy to your tongue...three times a day, as prescript, then i meet you in my dream..can we like umm...find a corner away from those Xmen?
i like you, dahling, even more tday..and i havent take my medication
wat does tat mean, anyway?
-wh
i like you, dahling, even more tday..and i havent take my medication
wat does tat mean, anyway?
-wh
cave
dreamt abt cave, i woke-up, googled it, wikied it, here's wat i came across:
Cave :Inner or hidden issues.Female sexuality. The past. Change and separation from love ones.
Cave: to dream that you are in a dark cave, signifies refuge or the unconscious mind. It also denotes that you experience some unexpected misfortune or disagreement
Barbarian: To see a barbarian in your dream, represents the savage and instinctual aspect of your character.?
now...detail on tat dream...i was with the guy, which i currently date. accompanied by some Xmen; wolverine, kitty, prof Xavier, and sum other insignificant member of Xmen.
full interpretation would be?
- wh
Cave :Inner or hidden issues.Female sexuality. The past. Change and separation from love ones.
Cave: to dream that you are in a dark cave, signifies refuge or the unconscious mind. It also denotes that you experience some unexpected misfortune or disagreement
Barbarian: To see a barbarian in your dream, represents the savage and instinctual aspect of your character.?
now...detail on tat dream...i was with the guy, which i currently date. accompanied by some Xmen; wolverine, kitty, prof Xavier, and sum other insignificant member of Xmen.
full interpretation would be?
- wh
kill me 9 times!
curiosity killed the cat.
i've heard so many times about it. i've experienced some in my life. the cat - me - get killed with its (my) curiosity. but it never stops me to get to know more. i'm a naughty and lousy "cat", and cat has 9 lives! yay... dunno if i already got killed 9 times, or maybe not yet.
i'm not dead. not yet. at least not at this moment.
i've heard so many times about it. i've experienced some in my life. the cat - me - get killed with its (my) curiosity. but it never stops me to get to know more. i'm a naughty and lousy "cat", and cat has 9 lives! yay... dunno if i already got killed 9 times, or maybe not yet.
i'm not dead. not yet. at least not at this moment.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
2 months..3 months...wateva babe!
does it reely matters how long you been together or 'together' with sumone? and why is it matters anyway?
here's what i think, we're so used to birthdays (celebration only make it worse), wedding anniversary...heck, even before we're born..our parents counted our stays in pre-natal period. the fact tat every culture developed a way of managing (dictating) their time, hence comes the calendars, almanac, clock, hour-glass...successfully made us (sure that) where we are now, sunday, feb 10th, 2008!
i dont give a shit about how long and 'where we are, at tis moment' when it comes to relationship, when i ask you..you want me to stay? when you says 'yes' then that's good enuf for me, to stay at the moment.
2 months...3 months...wateva babe!
- wh (smarty-pants mode:ON)
here's what i think, we're so used to birthdays (celebration only make it worse), wedding anniversary...heck, even before we're born..our parents counted our stays in pre-natal period. the fact tat every culture developed a way of managing (dictating) their time, hence comes the calendars, almanac, clock, hour-glass...successfully made us (sure that) where we are now, sunday, feb 10th, 2008!
i dont give a shit about how long and 'where we are, at tis moment' when it comes to relationship, when i ask you..you want me to stay? when you says 'yes' then that's good enuf for me, to stay at the moment.
2 months...3 months...wateva babe!
- wh (smarty-pants mode:ON)
remember me in the rain
What a dazzling rain! It’s like a storm with amazingly eerie sounds of thunder. Oh well, what’s so special about it? It is special as I am a person who really loves to see the rain, hard or soft doesn’t matter, as long as it still pouring waters.
I barely see anything from my room windows. All of suddens the view are just grey and blurry. It’s like the water swallowed all. Kinda scary but also lovely. Makes me drifting along with the orchestra of the sound of pouring rain and the screaming thunder. Sing along! Let’s sing along the sadness and drowning together until the water washed away our tears. Somehow you just have to accept that this glooming mind of mine is taking me away from reality. And I am fading…
Blended with the hard rain. Crying along with the wind. Frozen with its coldness. And the thunder strikes gives more power to survive the brokenness. I am not dead. I won’t be dead. Not today. I will always come to you when the windy rain knocking on your window. I am the angel of your nightmare.
Remember me. My flooding tears, cracking soul of mine, and my broken heart that you caused
-mm
I barely see anything from my room windows. All of suddens the view are just grey and blurry. It’s like the water swallowed all. Kinda scary but also lovely. Makes me drifting along with the orchestra of the sound of pouring rain and the screaming thunder. Sing along! Let’s sing along the sadness and drowning together until the water washed away our tears. Somehow you just have to accept that this glooming mind of mine is taking me away from reality. And I am fading…
Blended with the hard rain. Crying along with the wind. Frozen with its coldness. And the thunder strikes gives more power to survive the brokenness. I am not dead. I won’t be dead. Not today. I will always come to you when the windy rain knocking on your window. I am the angel of your nightmare.
Remember me. My flooding tears, cracking soul of mine, and my broken heart that you caused
-mm
Friday, February 8, 2008
sexy blood
This time, my imagination fails me. It's just nothing like Rodriguez - Planet Terror. Let alone the cast of appearance,
Was hoping sumthin more dramatic, nurses with skirts rite under their tush cat-walking around the facility with silver metal syringe strap under their skirts, male nurse pushing a gurney of well-covered body with blood dripping making cute dots on the white (or grey) PVC hospital flooring...
But instead, a mid-age oriental lady who think i'm under-age, "miss or missus?",
The room tho...wat is that smell?...u know rite?...aside from t fresh paint fume roaming around, i can still detect tat smell...a nurse approaching, start makin conversation so that i wont thinking abt the needle so much (another sucessful misjudgement), hence...me, sitting on a chair, strapped by the arm, making a fist, needle's in...aaah....almost as nice as my last orgasm...sexy blood!
- wh
Was hoping sumthin more dramatic, nurses with skirts rite under their tush cat-walking around the facility with silver metal syringe strap under their skirts, male nurse pushing a gurney of well-covered body with blood dripping making cute dots on the white (or grey) PVC hospital flooring...
But instead, a mid-age oriental lady who think i'm under-age, "miss or missus?",
The room tho...wat is that smell?...u know rite?...aside from t fresh paint fume roaming around, i can still detect tat smell...a nurse approaching, start makin conversation so that i wont thinking abt the needle so much (another sucessful misjudgement), hence...me, sitting on a chair, strapped by the arm, making a fist, needle's in...aaah....almost as nice as my last orgasm...sexy blood!
- wh
soul rebel
Dedicated to Mr. or Mrs Ordinary (not directed to),
Thank you for being the only person who interested in our blog.
Definitely, i wouldnt date maself at this moment (read: the next 5 years or so), reason no 1, i am completely unstable, i challenge maself every other minute to do sumthin odd (means: prozac odd)...reason no 2, i cant spell! why is tis important?...u'll figure it out sooner or later...reason numero tres, i eat anythin, on and off plate...but i am, totally a normal person with rebellions army loaded with sarcasm, synic (how do u spell synic?), etc etc inside my head. Deep inside (dunno where) I am the angel of mercy! Tested and proven.
Cheers!
- wh
i've had it !!!
should I explain what the tittle means?...it's insanely irritating, felt like being treated like shit here!
at least be a man like you always brag about and have the decency to tell so.
courtesy my ass!!!
- wh (out on killing-spree)
at least be a man like you always brag about and have the decency to tell so.
courtesy my ass!!!
- wh (out on killing-spree)
....blank...blank...
I've been collecting: needles, razor blades, daggers, knives, swords and samurais...tnite, they actually come quite useful...i store them so deep into my heart (if any left), accompany by my downer collection in i-Tunes, the very same time I'm typing these...it just felt reely good*, i wish i can be like other people who can just cry their heart out (if any left)...I DON'T CRY...over my own problems...i cried when my monitor ate my owl tho, so, when a guy said to me once "you don't have a heart do you?"...he was wrong, i do have, not much (if any left), definitely could use some of my writer fren's fancy words now...i want a fancy imitation life and put it in box, a glass, wdnt it be nice to look at when lightning strikes?
*mandy thinks am being a drama queen now
- wh
*mandy thinks am being a drama queen now
- wh
Thursday, February 7, 2008
secret getaway
b.o.r.e.d (as) bad - overrated - reaction - endemic - drag
i sit on one side of this meeting table here in my silent office space, mind numbing. just bragging about today, doing nothing but staring at an empty laptop monitor showing only wallpaper. what am i doing here? i'm totally lost! it's like i can't use my brain to give - even - any command to - at least - looks like i'm doing something. i'm not exaggerating.
maybe i need a vacation. i need to be somewhere else but this quite office. something more quite - actually - somewhere i won't be hearing phone ringing, or people whispering, and i won't see used paper lying messily or "no windows" room - like where i am now. or just plugging my ears with good music while drawing my imagination on canvas in one white empty room alone.
but where to? in a case like this - with peak schedules and missing in action team work - i won't be able to settle down in my hiding place either. and my cellular phone will just bothering me with some boring news, revisions, new home work, latest review, et cetera.
i really need a getaway. somewhere i know i will enjoy walking around with no one, or just sitting on a cozy corner of this wifi-ed coffee shop writing some thoughts with offline status shown on Yahoo! Messenger, so no one will bother me questioning about where-what-why-with whom am i now. please, people... i need my private place!
sometimes i find it fun taking pictures of anything i found interesting on the street - or anywhere i am at - do some photos editing on my laptop and treat it as souvenirs of my life. or sometimes my secret getaway is just a person. yes, a person i can cuddle with or just read some books together until we both fall asleep and wake up happy the next day.
ah... now, which secret getaway should i pick to get rid of my boredom today?
-mm-
i sit on one side of this meeting table here in my silent office space, mind numbing. just bragging about today, doing nothing but staring at an empty laptop monitor showing only wallpaper. what am i doing here? i'm totally lost! it's like i can't use my brain to give - even - any command to - at least - looks like i'm doing something. i'm not exaggerating.
maybe i need a vacation. i need to be somewhere else but this quite office. something more quite - actually - somewhere i won't be hearing phone ringing, or people whispering, and i won't see used paper lying messily or "no windows" room - like where i am now. or just plugging my ears with good music while drawing my imagination on canvas in one white empty room alone.
but where to? in a case like this - with peak schedules and missing in action team work - i won't be able to settle down in my hiding place either. and my cellular phone will just bothering me with some boring news, revisions, new home work, latest review, et cetera.
i really need a getaway. somewhere i know i will enjoy walking around with no one, or just sitting on a cozy corner of this wifi-ed coffee shop writing some thoughts with offline status shown on Yahoo! Messenger, so no one will bother me questioning about where-what-why-with whom am i now. please, people... i need my private place!
sometimes i find it fun taking pictures of anything i found interesting on the street - or anywhere i am at - do some photos editing on my laptop and treat it as souvenirs of my life. or sometimes my secret getaway is just a person. yes, a person i can cuddle with or just read some books together until we both fall asleep and wake up happy the next day.
ah... now, which secret getaway should i pick to get rid of my boredom today?
-mm-
tic...toc...tic...toc...
Am I the only who's hearing that?...Mandeeeeyyy!!!...Your relief well therapy sucks!!!
Lookin at maself in the mirror this mornin, close enuf to notice these blemishes, breakouts...I havent had that for years, Mandy! Thank's to you...my face is hideous! For sure..you'll blame me for being a compulsive chocolate eater, since I dont gain any weight (am very proud of this trait), dont see why not, eh? NOT!!!..U've never warned me about these tiny annoying bumps, didnt u?..didnt u Mandy?
Mandy, am tired of the waits....
- wh
Lookin at maself in the mirror this mornin, close enuf to notice these blemishes, breakouts...I havent had that for years, Mandy! Thank's to you...my face is hideous! For sure..you'll blame me for being a compulsive chocolate eater, since I dont gain any weight (am very proud of this trait), dont see why not, eh? NOT!!!..U've never warned me about these tiny annoying bumps, didnt u?..didnt u Mandy?
Mandy, am tired of the waits....
- wh
between lies and vanity
being born and raised from tis side of the globe makes it tough to number of women to detest a man out in the open, tho there were times where I could just scream, "Get the f*** out of my life!" (believe me I had my absolute-non-debatable reasons for it). Once you lied, you'll become a liar. No one's get hurt. A cheque is made by Mrs Courtesy.
then restraining myself, my safety-zone from delusional feelings once i knew what it's like, up to defending my vanity by mastering the art of counter-fitting words, thus you hear "i like you", as my best covered-up. I lied. I am safe.
- wh
blasphemy
you take out a well-written script, yanked-out a piece montblanc fountain pen, and starts to doodle your self thought-brilliant-idea (or so you thought it was), to improve (so you said) over anything you saw that wasn't ideally correct (by your pathetic-lowdown-standard)...seriously dude, I've watched "city of gods" once too many times, and by that i mean...next time we meet..you pull that stunt again..I'll shove that montblanc fountain pen so far up your a**! you'll drool ink down your nose...
blasphemy...refreshingly bold!
- wh (who else?!)
blasphemy...refreshingly bold!
- wh (who else?!)
One out of Ten
I dont have what you have, I envy, thus I steal what yours. Ever wonder why stealing made it to the 10 Commandments chart? As in my opinion, stealing is the beauty of money-revolution...I wouldn't steal anything (not that I have) if it weren't for that guy who invented money...what the f*** is wrong trading system (your tiring-outdated boyfrens with your frens')? If you must use some sort of currency..use Amber, Salt, Ham (f***, i want sum now, beb).
So, can I trade my boy with yours?
Trade: The original form of trade was barter, the direct exchange of goods and services
- wh
So, can I trade my boy with yours?
Trade: The original form of trade was barter, the direct exchange of goods and services
- wh
anything but thinking
“I think we’re dating now…”
You think?
Let me think...
You THINK we’re dating. Want to know what I think? I THINK we’re just sharing lust right now. Exchanging desires, making orgasms and screaming out our secret burden, eagerly pleased. Guess we never THINK about it when we’re doing it, eh?
And I THINK the dating part was just a bonus.
-mm
You think?
Let me think...
You THINK we’re dating. Want to know what I think? I THINK we’re just sharing lust right now. Exchanging desires, making orgasms and screaming out our secret burden, eagerly pleased. Guess we never THINK about it when we’re doing it, eh?
And I THINK the dating part was just a bonus.
-mm
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
the joy of slavery
“You work yourself to death, girl!” (unless you’re Hades, then this is would fall into slavery)…heard it only too many times, hold on… that “Twelve Labors Of Hercules” sounds like a slavery too doesn’t it?It’s not a slavery if you enjoy it, fuck yeah!..where else can you receive the joy of “interviewing”, select and de-select a line of six abs brondong march down your closed-door room with an invisible sign “producer” or “production room” or “casting room”…the labor of 3 days of shooting days somehow paid off (ode to Icha). Even Hercules smirked at the end of slaying Lernaean Hydra.
Slavery…no synonyms were found.
-wh, sat next to Mini Me
not enough
"i love you"
and that's enough
i said...
"i want you"
isn't that enough
i asked...
and there was silences
because i know
it's just not enough
for you...
-mm
and that's enough
i said...
"i want you"
isn't that enough
i asked...
and there was silences
because i know
it's just not enough
for you...
-mm
bad guys, hollywood vs others
HOLLYWOOD:
Seriously, did u checked out "scarface" lately?...who wouldn't wanna be Tony Montana?...you can reely tell by the bad guys whether the movie is worth spending some 25.000 rupiah or not (7000 for DVD bajakan) - words of a good fren of mine who insist of calling himself a movie buff, wake-up A...you're a movie snob. These bad ass bad guys always gets the girl, the money, the martini shaken-not-stirred, some even survived just before the credit title roll-up.
Vigilante...luring isnt it?
RAPI FILM:
I wouldnt go near other than Indonesia's film, anyone watch "Jaka Sembung dan Bajing Ireng"? (both Montana and Sembung have scar on their face)...who would wanna be El-Manik on that movie...given bajing Ireng character is quite "challanging"...and by the way folks...Montana vs Parmin? (parmin is the real name of Jaka Sembung)
Penjahat...not a very sexy one isnt' it? (except during that 3gp when the girl keep chanting "papa jahat...papa jahat")
-wh
Seriously, did u checked out "scarface" lately?...who wouldn't wanna be Tony Montana?...you can reely tell by the bad guys whether the movie is worth spending some 25.000 rupiah or not (7000 for DVD bajakan) - words of a good fren of mine who insist of calling himself a movie buff, wake-up A...you're a movie snob. These bad ass bad guys always gets the girl, the money, the martini shaken-not-stirred, some even survived just before the credit title roll-up.
Vigilante...luring isnt it?
RAPI FILM:
I wouldnt go near other than Indonesia's film, anyone watch "Jaka Sembung dan Bajing Ireng"? (both Montana and Sembung have scar on their face)...who would wanna be El-Manik on that movie...given bajing Ireng character is quite "challanging"...and by the way folks...Montana vs Parmin? (parmin is the real name of Jaka Sembung)
Penjahat...not a very sexy one isnt' it? (except during that 3gp when the girl keep chanting "papa jahat...papa jahat")
-wh
lame-o
what if i'm going to give birth to your child?
what if i'm going to kill my sin-full self?
what if i'm going to face my death in solitude?
what if i'm going to die because of you?
will you still care?
-mm
what if i'm going to kill my sin-full self?
what if i'm going to face my death in solitude?
what if i'm going to die because of you?
will you still care?
-mm
phlegmatic past
accidentally i found this old photograph in my friend's file when she burnt some pictures from her cellphone to a CD... quite enthralled me though, yet awkward. i see a very different situation there. my spoiled smile and his cool flat face. he's not as skinny as now, too... looks healthy and a little bit chubby on chin hehehehe... i forgot when was the picture taken. i just remember the location with a very late at night coffee talking, sleepy eyes, tired faces :) well, it's good to find some beautiful memories of him... yup! everything about him is always beautiful! my phlegmatic past.
-mm
-mm
Ratinnuendo Mornin...
Went to bed at 2 a.m, woke-up at 8, back to sleep again, got up at 10.46
Chinese New Year, the year of Rat….I checked out yahoo page just now, you shittin' me??? No report, news or anything about Chinese New Year!...
The fact that they’re nearing 1.7 billion populations in the country alone does not qualify to appear on front page of yahoo.com??? Yet, Obama and Hillary successfully showed me the true sensation of nausea.
Hey, my soon-to-be-Ex, is born under the Rat sign, but he never ratted-out on me, gave me a rat-snake once, afraid of rodents…phobia, coz one time he experienced the "joy" of a rat nibble on his toe. His dreaded hair sumwat look like rat-tail, and he enjoys that pseudo-french cartoon, Ratatouille
I had a reely nice conversation the other night, with you-know-who-don’t-say-i-said…I like that. Laughed my ass of over small things he often didn’t mean to say.
Movies…I draw a line on guys I’d date based on their movie preferences…”Ga ada film action ya?” – first date is okay, I mean I dig action sci-fi movies as much, thus follow the 3rd date he still aiming for action movies and went blank on color grading…what can I say man…?
Owh wait…if he’s good in bed, I might still be in touch, act wasted, need a rescuer, get the job done….**
**Mandy’s screaming at me, she said I give away too much! (fuck Mandy, how about that relief-well theory?..am digging that well now)
Well, merry rat year!
- wh
Chinese New Year, the year of Rat….I checked out yahoo page just now, you shittin' me??? No report, news or anything about Chinese New Year!...
The fact that they’re nearing 1.7 billion populations in the country alone does not qualify to appear on front page of yahoo.com??? Yet, Obama and Hillary successfully showed me the true sensation of nausea.
Hey, my soon-to-be-Ex, is born under the Rat sign, but he never ratted-out on me, gave me a rat-snake once, afraid of rodents…phobia, coz one time he experienced the "joy" of a rat nibble on his toe. His dreaded hair sumwat look like rat-tail, and he enjoys that pseudo-french cartoon, Ratatouille
I had a reely nice conversation the other night, with you-know-who-don’t-say-i-said…I like that. Laughed my ass of over small things he often didn’t mean to say.
Movies…I draw a line on guys I’d date based on their movie preferences…”Ga ada film action ya?” – first date is okay, I mean I dig action sci-fi movies as much, thus follow the 3rd date he still aiming for action movies and went blank on color grading…what can I say man…?
Owh wait…if he’s good in bed, I might still be in touch, act wasted, need a rescuer, get the job done….**
**Mandy’s screaming at me, she said I give away too much! (fuck Mandy, how about that relief-well theory?..am digging that well now)
Well, merry rat year!
- wh
insanely cozy
me, yeah tat initial - wh refers to me...what am i?...puuurtey much when u see sarcastic, egoistic paranoia, insecure, neurotic, much less optimistic with so many errors (grammatically, sumtimes politically) on tis bright and cheery blog..u can be sure i wrote it...
umm...please do: comments, we do accept harsh and trashy comments as well....
-wh (copy-righted)
* i won the spelling-R instead of spelling-bee title (R as in retard)
Salute!
umm...please do: comments, we do accept harsh and trashy comments as well....
-wh (copy-righted)
* i won the spelling-R instead of spelling-bee title (R as in retard)
Salute!
everything BUT BAD
What BAD is that you keep on going with a circle of fucked-up…you've been down that road before…yet, you think that this time it might be different somehow, yes *ma’am…clouding your mind with tons of “what ifs”
*my psychiatrist (imaginary one, I call her Mandy)
Okay, given that, miraculously you maintain a decent-distance, ..not too far but close enough to stick out your flags, with words such as “needed” “desperate” “moody” “fragile”…et cetera…uuuuw..love that word…et cetera, …ya huh? It’s me, starting to write again after like what?...ten or more freakin years of paper-mute?..yes, dahling…It’s me, a common english-classes-flunk-out gal, who’s start loosing words, implying; I’m not that vocab-less, (admitted, I AM right now!)…hence, begin reading!*
*Mandy noted me on how often I use the letter I…NARCIST!
Lately, my life, if you call that living at all, I may say…is nothing BUT…but what?...fuck, how would I know?...my shrink suggested a “relief-well” solution, dump my entire trouble (as in God pour water in a well the first place, before man digging the ground) into a 20 meter or so hole, then, I am supposed to…you know…on daily basis, I’m just in it for the drugs, woman!...Cant you tell???
Cut down on the curses, once she “prescribed” me, (I swear to Gawd, if I use more parenthesis, I’d be sitting next to Mini Me). Don’t think I swear that much anymore though-if you take-out my sex scenes (this means with another person)…currently I’m working on swearing on my rusted Javanese vocabulary for dirty words..i.e: “JENES” (got it from one of my aunty who think we cant get cable because, we live in a “JENES” neighbourhood, this she meant Seattle, 1997-or so, Broadway district). If any of you interested on finding out how to pronounce that word..gimme a hola! (got this thug-line from Matt, btw)
- wh
*my psychiatrist (imaginary one, I call her Mandy)
Okay, given that, miraculously you maintain a decent-distance, ..not too far but close enough to stick out your flags, with words such as “needed” “desperate” “moody” “fragile”…et cetera…uuuuw..love that word…et cetera, …ya huh? It’s me, starting to write again after like what?...ten or more freakin years of paper-mute?..yes, dahling…It’s me, a common english-classes-flunk-out gal, who’s start loosing words, implying; I’m not that vocab-less, (admitted, I AM right now!)…hence, begin reading!*
*Mandy noted me on how often I use the letter I…NARCIST!
Lately, my life, if you call that living at all, I may say…is nothing BUT…but what?...fuck, how would I know?...my shrink suggested a “relief-well” solution, dump my entire trouble (as in God pour water in a well the first place, before man digging the ground) into a 20 meter or so hole, then, I am supposed to…you know…on daily basis, I’m just in it for the drugs, woman!...Cant you tell???
Cut down on the curses, once she “prescribed” me, (I swear to Gawd, if I use more parenthesis, I’d be sitting next to Mini Me). Don’t think I swear that much anymore though-if you take-out my sex scenes (this means with another person)…currently I’m working on swearing on my rusted Javanese vocabulary for dirty words..i.e: “JENES” (got it from one of my aunty who think we cant get cable because, we live in a “JENES” neighbourhood, this she meant Seattle, 1997-or so, Broadway district). If any of you interested on finding out how to pronounce that word..gimme a hola! (got this thug-line from Matt, btw)
- wh
let down
dark hollow heart
down to the ground
let down
let them burnt to hell
keep the love alive without fears
i love you all the same
-mm
down to the ground
let down
let them burnt to hell
keep the love alive without fears
i love you all the same
-mm
love or lust?
i'm loving to make love
i made love to be loved
content and contained with
love, lust, desire
aren't we all?
so...
which one is yours?
i made love to be loved
content and contained with
love, lust, desire
aren't we all?
so...
which one is yours?
-mm
glooming corner
we, yes we ... some insane people trying to look sane in public, but deep down inside we're too busy glooming our self in this cozy corner of our each life...
join us?
join us?
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